I'm Back! (Kind Of)

So I obviously am VERY VERY SORRY but I have had life changes like starting university and moving house and turning 18 but I am back now!!! Although I am unable to promise anything in the way of never leaving again. But I will try very hard. Okay.
I finished Gone, and then went along and read Hunger and Lies. I am a bit annoyed at myself for not being able to stick to the chapter-a-day limit so I am planning to try again with a different book (I am planning to get out The Great Gatsby) and I still have Anne of Green Gables and Oliver Twist to work through. So hopefully you'll be seeing a lot of me from now on! :-)

Gone - Chapter Ten

274 Hours, 27 Minutes

Nothing terribly exciting happened in this chapter, so my review won't be too long.

Basically, Astrid uses her womanly powers to get all the boys to stop fighting, and Sam realises that Orc has assumed control because Sam didn't want to. Oooh heroes with flaws.

In Lana news, Lana has healing powers. This seems like a bit of a deus ex machina to me, tbh. There was no way she was going to get out of the situation otherwise, and her powers don't even sound that good? She has too sit there for like a hour before her leg heals. Although it is quite exciting to see these powers develop. I can only assume that Albert will have a power too. And Orc MUST have one. It's gonna get interesting.

Gone - Chapter Nine

277 Hours, 06 Minutes

I have just realised that I won't be able to finish Gone before I have to return it to the library if I'm only allowed to read one chapter a day. So i'm going to prioritise reviews of Gone, mostly to the detriment of Oliver Twist and Anne Of Green Gables (as I own those).

We're back with Sam and co., and Astrid has (yet another) brilliant theory: the wall may in fact be a dome, and they can see the sky because of the angle of the light.

Pretty much exactly like this.

And now Edilio (!) has arrived on a digger (!!) but :( because the barrier also goes underground. OH GOD WHAT IS IT

Quinn is all like being a bit of a dick to Edilio (who sounds like the man, btw) and pretty much causally racists at him by insinuating he's an illegal immigrant. Not cool, Quinn. The only reason I still like you right now is that you say 'brah'.

And now the kids are starting to get on each other's nerves. I predict the group will break up about halfway through the book. Although Sam describes Astrid's laugh as

"possibly the sweetest sound he had ever heard."

naaww he still likes her!

Astrid then finds a mutated seagull (I'm guessing this whole people having powers thing ties into that) and Quinn fully shuts down her train of thought >:-(

They drive off on a golf cart (Sam realises that there's only one road out of town lol) but then the bullies decide to chase them in a Hummer.

WHYYYYYYYYYYY PLZ WHY

Gone - Chapter Eight

287 Hours, 27 Minutes

So, now Mary (who I briefly thought was like Hermione lol) is changing a baby's diaper. Although I do appreciate the fact that the book's focus isn't wholly on Sam, maybs Michael Grant could stop switching viewpoints just when things are getting interesting? Also I have a theory that Mary has a power/is possibly evil.

Lol, it's not even a baby and not even a diaper. Although more seriously this highlights the problems that would crop up in a society where all the adults disappeared. A very large percentage of the skill base would also disappear; how would the children learn stuff?? Hopefully though only their town has been affected and the rest of the world is fine. Although the tagline of the book is 'This is how the World Ends'...

Wow, Mary has assumed control of the daycare, and her, her brother John, and some random Eloise are looking after 28 kids. Mad respect. Mary just got a ton of character development from this single paragraph and I think I like her more than Lana. And possibly Albert. Maybe even Quinn?

Anyway Mary has her moment of bad-ass when she gets in an argument with Howard (is he one of the bullies? I can't actually remember but I assume so :s).

Selective extracts:

"'Listen, you little worm. If I don't take care of those kids, they'll die. Do you understand that?...' 'You think that just because Sam likes to play the big hero every couple years that makes him the guy in charge?'"

See, I said that AGEEEES ago! Sam is just a kid, guys. He's not the boss. Also I think Mary must be a bit of a nerd as she was reading on the bus.

O
M
G

He just called Mary a bitch!!!!!!

Well actually apart from that the chapter was quite short and unexciting.

Gone - Chapter Seven

289 Hours, 45 Minutes

Okay, I (finally!) got Gone from the library (previously I'd been reading it as an e-book which sucked) and it's so nice to feel it in my hands! The cover is really exciting as well:

This book is good and exciting

So, Lana's still chillin' with the vultures except now it's dark so she can't see them. Lucky she's got her dog Patrick around! She's also real mad with her parents because they punished her for being a 14 year old drunkard. It's funny because she doesn't know that they're gone yet. She thinks it's just her Grandpa.

Um, OMG. She is now chillin' with A MOUNTAIN LION. Man America has some crazy wild animals. Oh, it's ok, her dog just defeated a lion?? Is that something that happens? I thought lions were killing machines. Oh wait, her dog is dying. Lol now the lion can just wait and then have two dinners!

Seriously though this is horrible and I see no conceivable way Lana will get out of this situation. And now we're switching back to Sam and co. Grrr the suspense

They haven't found Pete, but they hope that he's safe on the other side of the barrier, which stretches far out to sea. Maybe that IS where all the adults have gone? The kids decide to go to bed but Sam and Astrid have a little convo beforehand. Astrid reckons the wall might be a circle sealing in the town (I never thought of that, she IS smart) and it is revealed that Sam's birthday is in 11 days! And checking my post here:

"Now the next chapter seems to be counting down the numbers in its title? 300 hours is 12.5 days, so I'm guessing that's the timespan of the book. Maybe it's counting down to someone's birthday? As long as it's not Quinn or Astrid because they're my FAVES"

In which case it's rather obvious that the chapters are counting down to Sam's fifteenth birthday. And even though I don't particularly like his character, I'm scared about what might happen to him. Although I still have over 400 pages to go so it'll be a while before I get there luckily.

Astrid also does a little 'you're so brave and heroic and you don't get a choice about being a leader' speech which is ugh.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DID SAM BURN OFF HIS STEPFATHER'S HAND?!?!?!?!?!

Also is the next chapter about Mary DO NOT WANT

Gone - Chapter Six

290 Hours, 07 Minutes

Sam, Quinn and Astrid are still walking along in the dark in what is a TERRIBLE IDEA. It's very, very quiet (no cars and things to make noise) and dark. They briefly consider the fact that there will soon be a lot of dead babies in the world but then put it out of their heads. Too much to think about.

Wait. Venus is missing?? Is this some alien thing? I'm loving how I have absolutely no idea what is going on right now. I anticipate an extreme plot twist soon.

They then have a conversation which I will reproduce here as it is win:

""Let’s keep moving," Sam said. "We should have brought bikes or skateboards." "Why not a car?" Quinn asked. "You know how to drive?" Sam asked. "I've seen it done." "I've seen heart surgery performed on TV, too," Astrid said. "That doesn't mean I'm going to try it." Quinn said, "You watch heart surgery on TV? That explains a lot, Astrid.""

LOL, yes Sam, that would have been clever. Astrid, <3 <3 <3. Forever.

Okay, now they're at the hotel tennis court and there's a weird 'membrane'? This is aliens, isn't it. Damn you Michael Grant. Is just just in a family of alien authors? The barrier is slightly reflective and cuts straight through the net. It burns Sam's hand when he touches it (WHY SAM, WHY) and Quinn has a little spaz and attacks it with a chair.

And now we switch to a new character, Albert. (What happened to about-to-be-eaten-by-vultures-girl? Did she die?) He goes into a McD's but feels bad about going behind the counter. He also gets WITTY LINES (reminds me of Quinn). All of Albert's family (including his wheelchair-bound mother :-( ) have disappeared. He decides to take control (I guess he counts as an orphan now? I'm loving all these badass orphans n the books I'm reading) and starts serving some other kids.

(I turned the page and the first word of the next chapter is 'Lana' so I'm guessing she's not dead yet).

Gone - Chapter Five

291 Hours, 07 Minutes

It's nighttime oh noeeees

Okay, all the kids steal chocolate and soda (typical) but Sam pays for his. I am actually not really digging Sam's whole 'Mr Perfect' thing going on. It's annoying. Astrid probably paid as well but she's all rational which I think I prefer to Sam being all moral. Also: I predict Sam and Quinn will have a FRIENDSHIP BREAKUP sometime.

""Sam, do you think it's safe to go to my house? We have to get something." Sam shrugged. "Bette, I don't know any more than you do.” Bette nodded, hesitated, and walked away."

Sam = leader, even though he doesn't want it! Excuse me while I collapse under the weight of other books that have used this trope.

Okay the bullies have looted sledgehammers and bats from the hardware store :s whyyyy do these people exist

Astrid's brother (who I had COMPLETELY (or should that be com-petey LOL) forgotten about is nowhere to be found! But didn't they already establish that he was in the nuclear power plant? Also Quinn is flippin' out and I bet he'll run off or do something stupid and Sam will have to rescue him omg I will be ragin' if that happens because could Michael Grant have written some more original characters (except don't change Astrid, I'll love her forever).

Although Astrid believes in God (siriusly, Astrid? Oh well is guess she is ONLY FOURTEEN) she gets this fab line:

 "Sorry. I have this annoying tendency to analyze what people say. You'll either get used to it or decide you can’t stand me."

Um, is Astrid a fictional girl version of me???

I'm excited like this woman who may resemble Astrid!

 A brief tangent about the word pedantic, which Astrid uses to describe herself: when I was 13 (or maybe 14? IT'S A SIGN) my English teacher told me I was pedantic. And when I looked it up he told me that it just proved his point. I find this GROSSLY UNFAIR. And it was the beginning of my hatred of the subject English, but I'm getting off topic.

They have now decided to go to a luxury resort at night BECAUSE THAT'S A GOOD IDEA. hey, why don't you investigate that nearby haunted house in your most revealing underwear while you're there? Siriusly. Also, there is a conflict being set up between Sam and the bullies. This WILL be explored later in the book.

Anne of Green Gables - Chapter Eight

Anne's Bringing-up is Begun

Another short chapter yay! Short chapters are good because it means I have to spend less time reading this boring, boring book. I don't even care that the sticker on the front proclaims the book to be in the Whitcoulls Top 100 List. Although I've just checked it now and it's no longer on the list. Twilight managed to make it to #2 though!

The REAL cause of the disappearances in Gone.

So, anyway, (man, I should really stop starting my sentences with the word 'so'), Marilla decides to keep Anne (I knew it!) and Anne cries tears of joy. Of course Marilla will kill that buzz:

"'I suppose it's because you're all excited and worked up,' said Marilla disapprovingly."

Dear orphan: Please have THE BEST NEWS OF YOUR LIFE but your emotional reaction terrifies me as I am a very old woman who has never known love

Well good thing Anne's to call her Marilla because that's all I'll be calling her. Marilla then flabbergasts Anne by explaining that she never imagines things to be other than they really are. Oh Marilla you realist you. Realism/Idealism CONFLICT.

"'Here is something for you to notice, Anne. When I tell you to do a thing I want you to obey me at once and not stand stock-still and discourse about it."

Laying down the LAW.

Anne then gets down to work learning the Lord's Prayer, and we learn about Diana Barry, a possible friend for Anne. I do hope Diana is like Rachel and Marilla and that Anne will convert her. Anne then talks about her imaginary friend Katie Maurice (they were 'very intimate'), and her other imaginary friend Violetta (who was AN ECHO) but Marilla is all go to your room you fickle fool and Anne is all blah blah blah.

Then Anne calls herself 'Anne of Green Gables' THE BOOK TITLE ZOMG.

And tomorrow I get up to chapter 9 which I have been waiting for for a while!
PS: Although it's tomorrow for me, it won't be tomorrow for you, dear reader, because I'm going away the day after that and so am scheduling my reviews automatically over the next week. So you won't get to read my review of chapter 9 until Thursday I'm afraid. No more weekend posts.

Gone - Chapter Four

297 Hours, 40 Minutes

The kids decide to head off to the plaza (makes sense), only to discover a building on fire! Luckily Sam is around to inexplicably redemonstrate his braveness and leadership skills! He's just like those forty kids standing around gawking, only better!

Okay, I'll stop with the ! now. But seriously.

So they have to save some babies and the hardware store. And Sam is all BAMF:

""Dudes: Not tomorrow. Now. Now. Go! Quinn? You better go with them. We want to wet down the hardware—that’s where the wind will take the fire next." Quinn hesitated. People were not getting this. How could they not see that they had to do something, not just stand around?"

Also, 'this isn't the Disney Channel'. Well thanks for reminding us about that, Sam.

The disappearances are a punishment. She is the reason.

Also, Edilio is here! How do you even say that name? E-dee-lee-oh? So many -ee sounds.

""If you’re going in there, wrap this around your face." Somehow Astrid had come up with a wet cloth, borrowed from someone and soaked. "Did I say I was going in there?" Sam asked."

You didn't have to say it, Sam. We all knew it was going to happen.

Okay, so now Sam (WHO IS FOURTEEN, GUYS. FOURTEEN) is crawling through the building trying to save someone. Probably the someone will turn out to be important because this is a book.

O. M. G.

THE GIRL JUST SHOT FIRE OUT OF HER HANDS WTFFFFFFFF


I guess this is those powers I've heard of, then.

"Not thinking, just reacting, Sam extended his arm, palm out. There was a flash of light, bright as an exploding star."

Sam has a power too? That makes sense. Astrid had better have a power or I will be so mad.

"She was black, black by race and from the coating of soot."

Oh Michael Grant. What amazing description work here. The little girl died though :-(. And Sam doesn't feel better knowing that there's other people with powers out there. Prediction: the school bully will get a power. C'mon. It's gotta happen.

Gone - Chapter Three

298 Hours, 5 Minutes

Switch back to Sam, Quinn and Astrid to create SUSPENSE! They meet some other kids who have no purpose in life now that their parents are gone. Sam tells the kids to eat a cookie then head for the plaza.

They go to Sam's house (Sam's dad has been out of Sam's life for years. FAMILY TRAUMA) and of course his mother isn't there. But he's hiding something from Astrid? Is it a shrine to her OMG

""Sometimes impossible things happen," Sam said. "No, they don't," Astrid argued. "The universe has laws. All the stuff we learn in science class. You know, like the laws of motion, or that nothing can go as fast as the speed of light. Or gravity. Impossible things don't happen. That’s what impossible means." Astrid bit her lip. "Sorry. It's not really the time for me to be lecturing, is it?""

It's ALWAYS lecture time with Astrid.

Okay, Sam just has a weird glowing light into his closet. This reminds of the windows in the air in His Dark Materials (best series ever, btw). So THAT'S why the book has focused on Sam; he already has a connection to impossible things.

OMG SAM'S MUM'S DIARY IS SO MYSTERIOUS AND THE CHAPTER JUST ENDED ZOMGGGG

Anne of Green Gables - Chapter Six

Marilla makes up her Mind

I've noticed that my reviews for this book are quite a lot shorter than for Oliver Twist and Gone, so I'll try and write a longer review for this chapter.

Marilla explains to Mrs Spencer that there's been 'a queer mistake' and the message has somehow got garbled from Mrs Spencer's brother Robert, to his daughter Nancy, and then to Mrs Spencer. Why didn't Marilla just ask Mrs Spencer directly? Maybe now she's learnt her lesson that MINOR BOOK CHARACTERS CAN NEVER BE TRUSTED.

Lesson. Learnt.

Luckily, Mrs Peter Blewett (I really hope that's her husband's name and not hers) is looking for a little orphan girl! But how can the book be Anne of Green Gables if Anne leaves Green Gables?! Answer: it can't so she obviously doesn't.

Mrs Peter is horrible and Marilla feels 'a qualm of conscience' about handing Anne over. Well gee, Marilla, at least you have a small conscience. But she knows Anne is so miserable that she won't let Mrs Peter take her! Orphans 1, cruel oppressors 0 (Actually orphans get 2 for Oliver's BAMF escape from his place of employment).

Lol, Anne insults Mrs Peter (I think, what's a gimlet?) and Marilla has to hide an amused smile.

"[The Cuthberts] soon find it hard to remember what Green Gables was like without Anne Shirley."

This quote is from the blurb and we can clearly see Marilla being won over yeah! Go Anne, you feisty orphan you.

Okay. Are they married, or siblings?? I think they must be siblings because she says she's never had kids and is an old maid, and Matthew's a bachelor, so they MUST be siblings.

Next chapter: Anne says her prayers! Although something else must happen too as its 4.5 pages long.

There, that's a bit more reasonable length!

Gone - Chapter Two

298 Hours, 38 Minutes

It's counting down...

Kids are wandering all over the shop, lost, dazed, and confused.

""First we see about our parents," Astrid said. "It's not like there aren't any adults anywhere." She didn't seem sure of that, so she amended it. "I mean, it's unlikely there are no adults."

Oh Astrid, you are FABULOUS.

ABSOLUTELY fabulous!

Hermione is personally my favourite Harry Potter character so if Astrid is ANYTHING like her (and she really seems to be) then <3.

Oh dear, their town has a nuclear power plant that had an accident 'ages ago'. Well, there is a 2000% chance that this will be a plot point somehow. Maybs the plant goes into meltdown with no-one to staff it and some kids get crazy mutant powers? I'm sure I read somewhere that some people have powers.

The nickname of their town is 'Fallout Alley' and no-one wants to move there "even though all the radioactive fallout had been cleaned up."

WELL GEE, I WONDER WHY?

Oh no, Quinn's losing his cool :s

"His voice got louder each time he yelled. Louder and faster, and the sob was clearer, harder for Sam and Astrid to pretend not to hear. "

:-( I feel for these kids. They are way to young for something like this to happen to them.

Good old Astrid has flicked the light switch! Dealing with sirius problems by logical rationalising ftw. And now they've decided it's god.

I've read Left Behind, by Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins, which takes the same basic premise, with all Christians suddenly being removed from earth and taken to Heaven. I don't know how the series ends (I only read the one book) but I have a feeling that god isn't responsible here. But we'll see.

""Astrid's house next," Sam said. "She's closest." "You know where I live?"Astrid asked." 

LOL.

Oh Sam you stalker! Following people home is a BIG no-no.

Oh no, Astrid has an autistic brother called Pete and I'm guessing he's younger than her? Which means he's still around somewhere but he's not at the house.

Dun dun dun...

And now we switch to Lana and her Grandpa Luke, who are driving along in a pickup truck and WAIT WHAT'S THIS!?

"Your dad caught you sneaking vodka out of the house for some punk."

AM I THE ONLY PERSON WHO WAS NOT A 14 YEAR OLD ALCOHOLIC?!?

SIRIUSLY!!!!!

Ok, the truck obviously crashed because her grandpa vanished, and she broke her arm ewww. I've broken my arm twice and it's not even fun. At least Patrick, her dog, is alive! Oh wait OMG VULTURES ARGH THE SUSPENSE

Gone - Chapter One

I've decided to start reading Gone by Michael Grant.

Here it is.

So we'll see how this goes, shall we?

299 Hours, 54 Minutes

What do these numbers meannn

All I know about the book is that everyone over the age of 14 disappears? I think. Although those people on the front cover look waaaaay older than 14. She's wearing lipstick!

We're introduced to a whole host of characters straight away: Sam, who I assume is the protagonist; Mary, who I feel is like Hermione for some reason; Quinn, Sam's best friend; Edilio (?) a 'potentially interesting' kid; and 'Bouncing Bette'. What does that even refer to?

Okay, it turns out the Hermione character is actually Astrid Ellison, who's doing University stuff (at 13? wtf) and is a possible love interest for Sam!

Okay wait, time for exciting maths:

"On the chalkboard you could quite clearly see "Polyn." "She was writing the word 'polynomial,'" Astrid said in a church-voice whisper. "Yeah, I was going to guess that," Sam said dryly. "I had a polynomial once," Quinn said. "My doctor removed it.""

Oh maths. How I <3 thee.

Okay, it's flashback Sam time. It turns out he's quite average and doesn't exactly have a place in the school (how original). And he dialled 911 after his bus driver had a heart attack when he was like 12. The man.

OK WAIT, he also STEERED THE BUS ONTO THE SHOULDER OF THE ROAD AND PARKED IT SAFELY

"If he had hesitated for even a second, the bus would have plunged off a cliff and into the ocean."

Now maybe it's just me, but that does NOT sound like a typical 13 year old. And I know that the author wouldn't choose to write a book with a scared fool as the protagonist, but siriusly? Siriusly.

Quinn says "brah". LOVE

Oh god, there's no internet? YOU MIGHT AS WELL ALL DIE NOW, CHILDREN

No TV either??? WHYYYYYY

Okay, they're fourteen, which is obviously SO much better because it means that they're, like, mature now?

Sam and Quinn are scared about their 'moms' but (wait for this) Quinn is wearing shades. He's 14, in school, and is wearing sunglasses. Um, what. Oh well, they're going home to check out their families, which is pretty typical for someone in that situation I would think.

Now the next chapter seems to be counting down the numbers in its title? 300 hours is 12.5 days, so I'm guessing that's the timespan of the book. Maybe it's counting down to someone's birthday? As long as it's not Quinn or Astrid because they're my FAVES