Oliver Twist - Book the First, Chapter the Thirteenth

Reverts to the Merry Old Gentleman and his Youthful Friends, through whom a new Acquaintance is introduced to the intelligent Reader, and connected with whom various pleasant Matters are related appertaining to this History

So it's super duper chapter title length time! Also I am totally banned from saying 'so' for the rest of the review


I am pretty excited to be called 'intelligent' but Fagin is not merry AT ALL

This photo is too good to not use again

WHAT

Jesus Christ the first sentence of this chapter is TWENTY LINES LONG

Charley finds the whole situation hilarious:

"Master Bates..., bursting into an uncontrollable fit of laughter, flung himself upon a door-step..."

Cool.

DOES DODGEY HAVE A BRAIN TUMOUR

"'Toor rul lol loo, gammon and spinnage, the frog he wouldn't, and high cockolorum,' said the Dodger,"

Even cooler.

Fagin is Ragin' (that doesn't rhyme - I don't think - but it should) because he <3 Oliver obvs.
Ok I can't put too many quotes in but this stuff is gold. Fagin is nearly stabbed by a toasting-fork (what is that?) and he is constantly referred to as 'the Jew' as well. Their fight is interrupted, however...

By 'the menacing Bill Sikes'! (thank you, blurb!). Relative/Probable husband of Nancy?! He gets some great dialogue, and Fagin is scared of him (which can't be a good thing). There is some conversation that I don't understand but I think they really hate each other. At least Fagin calls Billy 'my dear' as well.

Nancy and Bet come back and Nancy is persuaded to go find Oliver at the police station (I think there's some casual mild sexism here but it's kinda hard to tell).

Oh man I totally forgot that 'the gentleman' has Oliver! The mysteriousness of the painting... How will Nancy find him? Will they try and kill him to stop him 'peaching'??

Anne of Green Gables - Chapter Eleven

Anne's Impressions of Sunday School

So Marilla has got some dresses for Anne AND WHAT'S THE CHANCE THAT SHE HATES ALL OF THEM???

"'I'll imagine that I like them,' said Anne soberly."

LOLOLOLOLOL I FUCKING LOVE ANNE

Anne wants a 'thrill' in the form of a dress with puffed sleeves, as they're in fashion. Marilla is having none of this because she doesn't believe in 'pampering vanity' and thinks the dresses are perfectly serviceable.

OH NO

Marilla has a headache so can't come with Anne to Sunday School and I COMPLETELY FORGOT that Rachel Lynde runs the Sunday School!

This is also a mild Doctor Who reference!!!

Since at this point I think Rachel is this book's Umbridge I am no longer a happy chappie.

Marilla also gives Anne a cent for collection which was probably like a billion dollars back then and is lol

Everybody is mean to Anne, whose happiness at being able to garnish her hat with flowers is dampened when she finds everyone else has puffed sleeves:

"Anne felt that life was really not worth living without puffed sleeves."

When Anne comes home she kisses Bonny's leaves (Bonny is a germanium as noted here) and proceeds to explain how dreadfully boring Sunday School was. Marilla is angry/anxious BUT THEN

"...some of the things Anne had said...were what [Marilla] herself had really though deep down in her heart for years..."

:D I LOVE ANNE SHE IS THE BEST

I'm Back! (Kind Of)

So I obviously am VERY VERY SORRY but I have had life changes like starting university and moving house and turning 18 but I am back now!!! Although I am unable to promise anything in the way of never leaving again. But I will try very hard. Okay.
I finished Gone, and then went along and read Hunger and Lies. I am a bit annoyed at myself for not being able to stick to the chapter-a-day limit so I am planning to try again with a different book (I am planning to get out The Great Gatsby) and I still have Anne of Green Gables and Oliver Twist to work through. So hopefully you'll be seeing a lot of me from now on! :-)